There are some principles of human endeavour that, if one should discover them
for oneself during one's lifetime, can and do make all the difference.
Personally, I like to track these principles, and a particularly delightful one
amongst them that has given me much joy over the years, is the "Happy, Happy
Zombie".
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As is usual, we must step back in time to a time when I was talking to someone,
a Catholic, about his fears of going to hell and suffering there endlessly.
It came to me to ask him, "You know, if you go to heaven, what do you become?"
He answered immediately. "You become an angel."
"Alright!" I said. "So, if you were to go to hell, what would you become?"
This question stunned him for a moment and he thought about it. Hesitantly, he
said, "A ... demon?"
I laughed out loud and said merrily, "That's right. You become a demon. You
would be right at home, with your great leathery wings beating against the
sulfuric updrafts and your infra red eyes would see the beauty of the landscape
around you.
"You would not think yourself ugly, or unfortunate in any way.
"You would be at home there, a demon in their rightful place, and time."
The gentleman in question was shocked, stunned and then absolutely delighted by
that way of looking at things.
He was quite scientifically minded as well and the whole thing made sense to him
- and although he still wanted to be an angel upon his demise, rather than a
demon, his great fear had left him.
I didn't really think much more about this until one day, I was watching TV with
someone who expressed their utter terrror at a zombie movie.
"That would be the worst fear realised," he said with a tremble in his voice,
"To become a zombie."
My mind immediately flashed back to the angels VS demons conversation many years
previous, and I started laughing as I got it how it works, again.
I explained this merriment to the distraught companion.
The fact is that all the fear people have of zombies is before the fact.
Once you've been bitten by one, you become a zombie yourself.
At that point, all your previous worries just disappear and you very literally
become - the happy, happy zombie, stumbling around with all the other zombies,
shouting, "Brains! Brains!"
You won't be worried about how you look, or smell, for that matter; you won't
really care if you lose a limb or two - you will be a zombie and do EXACTLY as
zombies do, and that is that.
So it is for all such things.
By all means, try and avoid the body snatchers. But once you've been body
snatched, know that you will simply join the ranks of all the other aliens and
you'll feel just fine and happy as the change becomes manifest.
There is no need for heart stopping terror at such fates.
Once the transition occurs, you are different, new and - safe right there. Until
another transition threatens, of course ...
I personally know a lot of people who "don't want to become ..."
- old
- a hippie
- a fitness freak
- a burned out rock star
- successful
- slim
- married
- divorced
- pregnant
- certified
- qualified
- unemployed
- rich ...
... and all sorts of other things that would spell the end of one existence, and
the beginning of another.
Terror arises as we look at those states of being from WHERE WE ARE RIGHT NOW
and JUDGE those existences FROM HERE, using the values which are appropriate
HERE - but not THERE.
Existential terror, if you will.
And this existential terror makes transitions unneccessarily scary upfront,
unneccessarily terrifying and heartstopping.
Remember the happy, happy zombie.
Once you actually ARE ...
- old
- a hippie
- a fitness freak
- a burned out rock star
- successful
- slim
- married
- divorced
- pregnant
- certified
- qualified
- unemployed
- rich ...
... you simply join the ranks of all the others who are just like that, and you
will be in the environments and situations which are perfectly - and do
remember, PERFECTLY! - appropriate, aligned AND RIGHT for that state of being.
Your troubles and fears will be resolved profoundly, and on you go on your path,
just the same.
You'll be dealing with new challenges (like where that next tasty brain will be
coming from!) that you can't conceive of as yet, and you'll find new rewards and
experiences that likewise, will be quite new to you in all ways.
Either way, IT'LL BE QUITE ALRIGHT.
So by all means, let go off that existential terror now.
For all you know, being a happy, happy person might stand you in much better
stead than being totally frightened out of your wits when it comes to it, in the
end.
But either way, IT'LL BE QUITE ALRIGHT.
That's worth remembering, and I find both much comfort and amusement in "The
Happy, Happy Zombie Principle".
SFX Jan 2007
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